(Unsent) letter to a father

I am reading several books at the moment, one of which is very dark indeed.  It is written by a legal scholar who teaches at Columbia, and it is about some of the ways in which our government has been in recent years (since 9/11 particularly) literally at war against many of its own citizens.

 I know that this is true, and I also know that I am very lucky.  I was affected enough by it to be angered by it.  The anger is deep enough that I must be careful around people of a certain kind of sensibility, such as yourself, who will accuse me of hatred. 

Do torture victims hate their torturers?  Or the government that is responsible?  And how do prisoners react to being wrongly imprisoned? 

And you of course say, but this is America, and such things do not happen here. 
I know otherwise.  That is not an opinion, it is a fact; those who deny it, lie.  They have reasons to lie, of course.
I do not like lies and liars, especially those whose lies are told in support of crimes. 

There are governments that commit crimes.
No government and no one has the right to say that its actions are beyond criticism. 
Only a fascist would say that anyway.

I do not need to believe that my country’s government does good and not bad things, unless the belief is true.
If it commits crimes, I am not scandalized nor necessarily surprised.

I don’t like the crimes.  But it is only fascist governments that impose a regime of silence on their critics.
No one has that kind of right to tyrannize. 

You need to believe that your government is fundamentally good.
I understand. It is so pathetic in its way.
You will say that we its critics “hate” it, but of course those of your faction hate us,
And they are the real haters.

And look what they do with their hatred.
The imprison, they torture, they kill.   And then they blame the victims for hating them for their violence.
Or for rebelling.

How could you compare a victim of Nazism who hates that system to the Nazis themselves with their hatreds?

The victim of crimes, including official crimes, and I am one, and dare speak as such, has a right to blame. 

He has a right to be angry, even a duty to be.  And to accuse.  To say, “J’accuse.”  I do.

I accuse every collaborator, every accomplice, every cheerleading bystander. 

You are welcome to think my opposition to this is “conservative.”  National Review magazine thinks every interesting filmmaker today is a “conservative”; that is rarely if ever true in fact, but they may as well be complimented, as it means the reviewers like their film, and perhaps can’t help liking it, so much they’d like to claim ownership of its ideology. 

I am against government abuse.  I was victimized under the Obama administration.  It had some very un-liberal qualities, as all our recent governments have.  Your faction is only worse because they are very blatant, since they don’t have to pretend to be liberals. 

These are practices of a government ruling by “state of exception” or “emergency.”  An emergency can be declared at any time and for any reason, and a permanent one declared after 9/11 is still in effect.  That means the police or FBI could detain me at any time for any reason.  I am guessing they do not right now because I might be able to get attention drawn to their crime.  For it would be a crime, albeit one committed by a government that has officially abrogated, either in the particular instance concerned or in a more general way, the very rule of law.  The Constitution your faction pretends to worship, or did at least until recently. 

Mr. Trump has no respect for that Constitution at all.  He is a thug.  His supporters have blood on their hands.  I am not interested in being friendly to such people.  Why should I?

I was lucky.  They did subject me to what is certainly a formal of mental or psychological torture.  I do not appreciate it.  I am traumatized by that. 

Do you believe, given your military values, which are credible and understandable (like Stoicism, etc.), that I should be morally strong enough to just take it in stride?  If that means legitimate what they did and not hate that they do this to people, no way! 

What I should take from this experience is the determination to oppose the often far greater abuses done to so many other people.  Domestically and abroad. 

Abroad, Israel does it all the time, in its occupations, and of course now in this way, which is effectively genocidal whether that is the intention or not.  I think the intention is to create a Palestinian-free greater Israel/Palestine.  The Palestinians were tolerated in Gaza, after they and their parents and grandparents had been driven out in the 1948 from what is now Israel proper.   They were not convenient as neighbors there.   Now they are not convenient in Gaza.  Israel does not care much whether they are killed or removed and leave.  The Germans had a similar attitude for some time towards the people they didn’t want. 

And it’s not just there, it’s here.

Ideologically, a fascist state has media that support what it does.  Murder can be given a polite and friendly face.  Even, the person who complains can be blamed for upsetting the social club.  Much of the American South is like that, and you can find this in California, too.  I encountered much of this.  They call it “friendly fascism.” 

You could be fired for speaking of such things.
But is it worth compromising your conscience by being a coward?

What do victims of torture and other official crimes do? 
What do Holocaust victims do?
They do want to get on with their lives, they do love their friends, they may find it more difficult, and they should not be amused, as they may not be, when they are blamed for the difficulties.

I was tortured mentally and psychologically.  I have a rage about this and would be wrong not to.
Yes, I hate, I hate those who did this to me, who do it to others, who justify it, who collaborate in it.

It would be wrong not to. 

If I am treated like a pariah because I say such things, why should that give me pause?
I have always been a pariah, and liable to be treated like one. 

It’s true that it used to be many Jews were pariahs.  Now very few of them.  Good for them on both counts. 
I am a pariah.  I am proud to be a pariah. 
I don’t need a special warranted identity to justify my claim that I should not be treated as a pariah.

For all I know, it is my fate and destiny to be treated as a pariah.
I will bear this burden as well as I can.

 Meanwhile, I say to Americans, stop your government from doing the violence it does to so many people.
Its flimsy and dishonest justifications notwithstanding.